What to Expect

When your son or daughter begins the journey that is college, he or she won't be the only one dealing with a wide range of emotions. Anticipation, anxiety, confusion and hope are all common feelings for parents, as well as students.

Your student will experience growing independence, knowledge in new areas and meet new people. But what does this mean to you as a parent? With a few simple reminders and an awareness of the changing situation, your child's college experience can be a positive situation for you as well.

Because of the Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act (FERPA), your child must sign a release form to give you access to grades, financial aid documents and other education-related records.
While e-mail and cell phones are great ways to keep in touch with your child, don't forget about "snail mail." Your student will love receiving cards and packages from home.
Not knowing how to be helpful to your student can be a frustrating experience for parents. Experts advise a parent's best role is to provide a steady, supportive home base while recognizing there will be ups and downs in the students' needs and expectations. Try to follow up the leads of the students and encourage them to work through a problem with you acting as a coach. Help them balance their new responsibilities and let them know you respect their right to make decisions.
Remind yourself to notice and appreciate their new skills they learn. Students often want their families to recognize their progress toward becoming adults.
Most parents have a high investment in their student's decisions. Problems arise, however, when parents are more invested than students. It can be hard to decrease the involvement in a student's decisions out of fear that the student won't assume responsibility. The irony is that students often don't accept the task of being responsible until parents step back. The fear that the student is not accepting responsibility makes most parents lose sleep. There is, however, no need to become disinterested or frustrated. Consider providing a concerned voice and remind yourself that you are helping by working with your student on developing his or her own decision making skills.
Academic standards in college are much higher than in high school. Students used to receiving high grades in high school may be disheartened by lower marks in college. This is the time when they will need to discover how they should be studying and motivate themselves to do so. Finding support to deal with these challenges can also be important. Parents can remind students to ask questions in class and to take advantage of available resources. Parents and family members can also provide the support students need.

It would be nearly impossible to describe all of the situations that could be encountered by both student and parents throughout a college career. Yet, with understanding and support parents can ensure that your child's college time is beneficial for all.

Adapted from the University of Delaware and the University of Alabama in Huntsville

High School Students, Parents & Staff

What to Expect